Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Fashion and Beauty Ignominies (Part 2)

I forgot to mention some other ignominies in my previous post. And these may be the worst. Ever.

- "Teint d'Orange" effect: it means "orange's complexion" effect. Namely, when one's skin acquires the colour of a fruit - orange. Or a vegetable - carrot. Or an oompa-loompa. Not very natural. And we humans come in a fantastic, beautiful range of colours: from deep ebony black to pale, almost blueish white, passing through warm and cool shades of delectable browns, mysterious olives, peaches and cream, flawless yellows, roses, autumn earthy shades, golden, copper and bronze skins, neutral beiges, sallow beauties etc... But no oranges. Not a glimpse of an oompa-loompa. Or a green Martian, for that matter. So, people love fake tans. Fact. But fake tans risk to turn us into orange, tangoed beings. Looks weird. It's a little crime against beauty. And diversity.

- Ornamental Fish Syndrome: now, I must point out I am not against plastic surgery. If you have the money, the guts and if it will make you happier and improve your quality of life, go for it. Most important is to find a very good surgeon. What I am against here is a bad, unprofessional practice with dodgy results. The Ornamental Fish has eyes that pop out, an unchangeable inquisitive expression, and lips that also pop out. The "inquisitive expression" consists of eyebrows bordering the hairline (yeah, "up there"), simulating an air of frozen, constant surprise: "Ooooohhh"... And foreheads that do not move. Excessive face lifts, botox injections, restylane, you name it. Looks bad. Plain bad.

- Breast enhancements: as above, but this time the breasts popping out. Who says bigger is better? Can be very bad for your back. Carnival in Rio is where you can see all these atrocities. On parade. From ornamental fish to big-is-better. Again, I am definitely not against it. I just think the humongous, fake, heavy effect is a no-no. It's great if you can lift it up when it gets saggy, or correct it if necessary or if it annoys you somehow. But the obviously fake big thing is completely out, in my humble opinion.

Well, that's it for today. I don't want to sound like an inquisitor or anything. Just sharing my opinion on these things, and whenever we are bombarded with celebrities' bodies and crazy beauty fads. I don't know...

Ah well, I am tired now. Had a bad night, and Mark too. Now we both got a headcold and are taking our Lemsips. Bleeeaaarrgghh...

Hasta la vista,

a.

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